26. Kittens to Give Away
A: Look at all these kittens!
B: How many are there?
B: They're all so cute.
A: Yes, but I can't keep them.
B: What are you going to do with them?
A: I'm going to give them away. Do you want one?
B: Yes, I would love one.
A: Which one do you want?
B: That one. The one that's all black.
A: Yes, I like that one, too.
B: I'll call him Blacky.
27. Happy in Heaven
A: My parents go to church every Sunday.
B: They trust in God.
A: They hope they will go to heaven.
B: They probably will.
A: But no one knows for sure.
B: That's for sure.
A: No one knows what happens after we die.
B: If we are good, we will be happy in heaven with God.
A: That's what many people believe.
B: If we are bad, we will be unhappy forever in hell.
A: I don't want to go to hell.
B: Let's go to church with your parents on Sunday.
28. His Line Is Never Busy
A: My husband died.
B: I'm sorry for you.
A: Thank you.
B: When did he die?
A: A couple of months ago.
B: You still miss him.
A: Yes, but I talk to him almost every day.
B: When you go to church?
A: No, when I call him on his cell phone.
B: What do you mean?
A: I buried him with his cell phone.
B: What will you do when the battery dies?
29. Friday the 13th
A: Today is Friday the thirteenth.
B: That's a bad day.
A: It's supposed to be unlucky.
B: You're supposed to stay home all day.
A: That's what I do.
B: My friend stayed in a hotel on Friday the thirteenth.
A: That was a mistake.
B: He stayed on the thirteenth floor.
A: What happened?
B: Someone stole his laptop.
A: He was asking for it.
B: He learned his lesson. He's home today.
30. Do You Love Me?
A: Do you really love me?
B: Of course.
A: Prove it.
B: How can I prove it?
A: Take me to dinner.
B: That's it? That's all I have to do?
A: Take me to a nice restaurant, not to McDonald's.
B: But a nice restaurant costs money.
A: Yes, and you have to make a reservation.
B: That's such a hassle.
A: I knew you didn't love me.
B: Okay, okay! I'll make a reservation right now.